Killer Hamburgers From Hell

It was a silent and quite foggy night on Arliss Mulligan's Cow and Potato farm. Farmer Arliss was busy inside the house, polishing his shotgun. Suddenly, from inside the barn, he heard a "moo."

"Dag blammit! Somebody's in m'barn!" the man announced.

Trusty (and quite shiny) shotgun in hand, Farmer Mulligan trekked into the foggy outdoors to find out just what was makin' them cows go "moo."

He kicked open the barn door, unleashing the moon's bright illumination to the living things within. There inside, much to Mulligan's irritation, sat an old gypsy woman with three teeth trying to bite into a rock.

"Boobulla boobulla, that's bright light," stated the old gypsy woman. She looked at the rock she had been gnawing on for quite some time. "Boobulla boobulla, I was wondering why this tomato was so hard."

"Git yer wrinkled, rock-eating rear end outta my barn! Farg nabbit, yer botherin' th' cows!" boomed Farmer Mulligan.

The old gypsy woman stood up. "Boobulla boobulla, I curse you!" she exclaimed.

"You what?" inquired the confused farmer.

"Boobulla boobulla, I curse you with SATAN'S WRATH! I curse your cows! I curse your potatoes! Satan curses your cows, Satan curses your potatoes! Boobulla boobulla!" The woman began to glow bright red.

"If you say 'boobulla boobulla' one more time," spoke the steamed farmer, "I'm gonna empty both these barrels right into ya, durg flurbit!"

"Boobulla boobulla," continued the red woman, "I curse your cows and potatoes! They belong to BEEZULBUB! BOOBULLA BOOBULLA!"

With that, Arliss Mulligan pulled both triggers, and the woman's bloody inards sprayed all over the barn wall behind her.

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